I still seem to be gathering my bearings, wondering where the hell this year is leading. I’m at least glad 2011 is over. There were far too many disappointing things.

But I did manage to fit in something rather satisfying in December: I took a flying trapeze class.

I went to Las Vegas with my cousin earlier in the month. We did something you just don’t do in Vegas: visit a museum. The Neon Museum is VERY easily the best thing I’ve ever done in Vegas. Honestly, it restored my interest in a city I’d come to despise. I hate the place a little less now. Next time, I want to go to the Atomic Testing Museum. Yes, there will be a next time!

So I do have some resolutions for this year, aside from the normal self-improvement ones that I constantly give myself (see the 2010 post):

1. Write at least enough songs for another record. I’ve been taking a break from music for far too long, and I need to give myself a goal. So I bought some journals and have already been writing down lyrics. I know I have tons of things I want to say already, so that’s a good start.
2. Dress more feminine. It’s time I grow up and look like an adult, rather than some kid.
3. Be more positive, even when nobody’s around. I think I’m very outwardly positive when I’m around people. And I think that’s what has kept good people in my life. But when I’m alone that energy tends to disintegrate. Last year really tested me in a lot of ways, and I’m still trying to recover from the disappointments. So this is a step towards recovery.
4. Cook more. I know I’ve said this before, but this time there is a goal. I want to write a cookbook. I already have a game plan for the stages of development I need to make it successful. I don’t know if I would necessarily end up selling it, but so far, I’m doing it for me. Once I gain some confidence with my recipes, I may end up taking it public. But just know for now that I make some pretty bomb-ass food.

Anyway, that’s it for now. I look forward to better days.

I went to a psychic the other day. It was just for fun, but I feel that I am currently at a point in my life where I might be open to suggestion. I actually don’t really believe in that shit, but she started saying things that were really specific about my life to the point where I got goosebumps. And I even gave her my poker face the whole time, littered with a stone cold “ok” here and there. I didn’t even ask her any questions or tell her why I was there. Everyone assumes that I had an appointment with her and that she researched me ahead of time, but I was actually a walk-in. Based on her success with previous clients, I’m hoping that her predictions about the coming months come true. It was just too weird and specific. And they were all positive things, so it’s good to be optimistic.

I’m hoping that there is a point to things not panning out in the way that I’d originally hoped they would. I’m hoping things are about to balance out.

So it’s best to stay silent.

There’s still a possibility I might return. There are a few things that I’m waiting on to unfold, but at the moment I’m just focusing on what my life is in Los Angeles. I’ve been spending time with my family mostly, but I’ve started working on new music, and I’m quite proud of myself because I’m not just hating everything that comes out of my brain. I’m actually really enjoying the process, and I really want to aim to have enough for a record at the end of the summer.

I’m just trying to figure out where my life will take me next.

What is it? About halfway through the year and I’m writing my second entry? Sorry. I had originally planned to write about gear/music, but then I got side-tracked.

I’m at a point where I’m kind of confused about where to go now. I just turned 27, and while that’s not an old age, it really doesn’t feel young anymore. I feel like I’ve experienced a lot of things, yet not enough for this point in time. I want more. My friend Niyaz and I have been calling this “The Year of No Regrets”. I don’t have any so far, but if I don’t do something about where my life is going, I’m going to regret it. So, it is with this entry that I chisel it in stone. I am going to do something about it, and things will change by the end of the year. Just you wait.

1. Be in the moment. I think it’s really important to remember that the past has already happened and the future isn’t here yet. The present is all we have.
2. Eat well, at home and homemade as often as possible. I hate going to restaurants and thinking, “I can totally make this at home and better!” Since making this resolution, I’ve re-discovered how gratifying making my own food can be.
3. Do not buy anything I don’t need. This is something I think everyone should learn. I am not usually materialistic, but I do have my moments, and I blame self-expression.
4. Stay optimistic. Be kind to people. Not enough can be said about the importance of being nice. I know I’m not always nice and there are exceptions to the rule, but I do my best. I try to think outside of myself.
5. Do my best.
6. Write every day. I admit. I have dry spells where I feel completely void of any kind of inspiration. But I think I need to open my eyes a little wider and be more observant of things going on around me. Inspiration is everywhere.

So as part of my plan to change the direction of my life in this new year, I’ve decided to restart this blog. I didn’t realize how annoying it would be to change it from a “journal” to a “blog”, but I worked it out.

Since I last wrote I took up archery, released a record, traveled up to Northern California to see trees, wrote some songs, got 2 violins and 2 ukuleles… and that’s all I can remember right now. There have been more exciting things but nothing I care to talk about to a large audience.

So, life is good. I’m going to London for the entire month of March. I’m pretty sure it’s going to be amazing.